Why That Sucky Blog that Sucks Has More Followers Than You Do, Part I

Yesterday, the Daily Post asked a question that I often obsess over:

Daily Post at WordPress.com

What makes a blog great? What makes you follow a blog or “Like” a post?

I’ve considered this very question before in Why I Stopped Liking Your Blog Posts, but I continue to wonder about it.

For the record, Do Not Get Sick in the Sink, Please is rapidly approaching 1000 followers, numbers which have been buoyed by a sudden and surprising popularity in Jakarta, a place where everyone seems to be inspired to blog about generic Viagra.  I guess “Viagra Blogs” are their version of “Mommy Blogs”.  Anyway, I can’t complain too much about my Jakartan followers because at least they speak English, and I guess I can imagine someone there maybe making sense out of a post like Let Go and Let God (Find You a Date for Saturday Night).  However, I reserve the right to continue to be suspicious of the mass of followers I’m accumulating in the smallest country in South America, Suriname (pop. 560,000–there are more people living in Vermont), where the official language is Dutch.

In order to answer the question posed by the Daily Post, first we have to understand the different types of Likes and Follows on WordPress blogs.

  1. Fake Like/Follow: the reader has never read a post on your blog, but Likes/Follows because they have an ulterior motive.  Usually, the motive is merely that you will return the Like/Follow (see: Reciprocal Like/Follow) but sometimes it’s to get you to go to their blog and buy generic Viagra.
  2. Reciprocal Like/Follow: the reader has not read a post on your blog, but Likes/Follows only to get you to Like/Follow their blog. This almost always works with newer bloggers, desperate to increase their readership, and almost never with older bloggers, who have become cynical and jaded by too many bloggers trying to sell them generic Viagra.
  3. Pity Like/Follow: the reader has actually read your post/blog (finally!) and doesn’t really like it, but they press the Like/Follow button because they feel sorry for you, usually because your post is so pathetic they’re hoping to forestall your suicide by Liking/Following.
  4. Stalker Like/Follow: the reader is reading every blog post you write, Liking/Following you, following you on Facebook and Twitter, sending you email, and also hiding in the bushes outside your apartment.
  5. Lurker Like/Follow: the reader pops up on your blog occasionally, and comments just often enough to make your spouse suspicious that there may be something more going on with that blog of yours.
  6. Genuine Like/Follow: the reader likes you, they really like you.

So there you have all the different types of Likes/Follows.  In tomorrow’s post, Why That Sucky Blog that Sucks Has More Followers Than You Do, Part II, I’ll discuss why those other bloggers are getting so many Viagra Bloggers, as well as some genuine, real life people, to Like/Follow their blog, even though it sucks.

Advertisements

45 thoughts on “Why That Sucky Blog that Sucks Has More Followers Than You Do, Part I

  1. Austin says:

    I didn’t realize there were so many categories of “Likes”. Now I’m going to try to analyze every like I get on my blog. Hmmm… 🙂

    Like

  2. Michelle at The Green Study says:

    It’s pretty easy to figure out what’s what after a little time in the blogosphere. I have had my rant about spam followers, but apparently that post really got the ball rolling, as numbers have gotten erratic and weird. Spammers really, really like me.

    Like

    • Karen says:

      I think it’s really surprising that there are people out there who think they can grow their business by Liking the posts of random bloggers on WordPress in the hope that the bloggers will make their way back to your company’s site and buy a bottle of knock off Viagra manufactured in North Korea (or wherever). I’d like to have been at that corporate strategy meeting.

      “Hey! How about this idea?”

      Like

      • Michelle at The Green Study says:

        Spam is always a numbers game and can be done extraordinarily cheaply. Just not sure who’s buying into it that it still makes money. I suppose as people get more tech savvy and sophisticated, so will the spammers.

        Like

      • ClewisWrites says:

        Well it’s funny because people have been “told by experts” that joining the conversation is the best way to do it so they just go around doing just that. It’s quite amusing to see how people play that game!

        Like

      • Karen says:

        You know, I’m thinking more about this, and I spent enough time in the corporate world that I have absolutely no doubt that this dumb idea could be pitched in a meeting and be greeted with enthusiasm (and probably a promotion).

        Like

  3. Elyse says:

    You mean that Viagra isn’t the good stuff?

    I get tons of followers who speak (or at least write in Chinese or some Slavic language I don’t recognize. It makes me feel loved.

    Like

    • Karen says:

      Don’t buy generic boner pills!

      Yeah, when I see a Like from another blogger who’s writing in a completely different alphabet on their own blog, I’m always reminded of the Norwegian blogger who pinged my post the first time I was Freshly Pressed. He posted it on his blog with the disclaimer (in Norwegian, which I had to run through the Google translator to see what he was saying about me), “I don’t know what this post is about, and I don’t understand it, but it was Freshly Pressed.”

      So while I’d like to think my humor translates across international boundaries, I tend to think I appeal to a limited number of Americans who, like me, have too much free time on their hands.

      Like

  4. willc88 says:

    Haha yep! about a week or two in I got a fair few “make money blogging” followers and at first was like oh yeah nice the stats are racking up, but they are empty followers!

    Like

  5. Caitlin @ The Siren's Tale says:

    “Fake Like/Follow: the reader has never read a post on your blog, but Likes/Follows because they have an ulterior motive. Usually, the motive is merely that you will return the Like/Follow (see: Reciprocal Like/Follow) but sometimes it’s to get you to go to their blog and buy knock off Viagra.” — Haha, this is perfect. I have a few “followers” on my blog that literally like a post within 2 seconds of it being published. I know I’m way too long winded in my posts for ANYONE to read it in 2 seconds. C’mon now!

    Like

    • Karen says:

      I have a story to tell about one of those Super Speedy Likers. I used to see this one blogger Like all my posts immediately after I published, never commented, just immediately Liked within seconds of publication. I was sure he had some sort of program that he was running on his computer that automated his Likes and he never actually looked at my posts, just automatically Liked.

      Until I “ran” into him commenting on another blog and he saw my comment there and replied to me, saying how much he enjoyed my blog, it was one of his favorites, how I always made him laugh. He was an actual fan, not a Fake Liker at all. So I’m not sure if he was reading all of my posts, but he was reading enough of them to know that he Liked me, and wanted to share his genuine opinion of my blog with others.

      The moral of the story is that some people really do Like your blog, they’re not all Fakers!

      Like

  6. Heyjude says:

    Interesting post, and I really like it, but not so you have to take a look at my blog. I’m sure the majority of my likes are so I look at their blogs – or maybe they just feel sorry for me 😉
    xx

    Like

  7. bodycrimes says:

    I think I’m doing something wrong when somebody putting the term ‘inject women with heroin and sell them as sex slaves’ brings them to my blog. (Yes, really.)

    Like

    • Karen says:

      Wow, that’s crazy. Did he/she Like your post at least? It always bothers me when people find my blog by searching “filthy sick porn” but don’t bother to at least Like a post, but I guess they’re probably disappointed to find I’m only making dick jokes and talking about books, mostly.

      Like

  8. Gus Sanchez says:

    I’m really popular in Southeast Asia and India, for some reason, especially among the tourism blogs. Weird. My blog about being a fledgling writer must resonate quite deeply with someone with a middling grasp of the English language. Oh well, I’ll take the inflate blog follower numbers; I’m a stat whore like that.

    Like

    • Karen says:

      Boy, you just gave me a scary thought with that “middling grasp of English” comment–do you think there are folks out there trying to improve their English by reading our blogs? I’ve been trying to teach myself Spanish for awhile now, and this struck me as a good idea until I remembered what I blog about . . .
      😉

      Like

  9. K. Jean King says:

    You know, I had a stalker, and the dude left. On the one hand, I no longer have to sleep with my shot gun, but on the other hand I had to go back to my therapist to revisit my abandonment issues. Double-edged sword.

    Like

  10. Winnie says:

    Controversial subject matters always get some followers that just love to be controversial etc. Lots of funny reasons to get followers, and lucky for me that the ones you mention like to follow me on twitter. They are so obvious! Loved your explainaton for each “type”.

    Like

    • Karen says:

      Thanks for the kind words. I’ve probably spent too much time analyzing this subject, and should try going outside and getting some fresh air sometimes.

      Like

  11. Clever Girl says:

    I didn’t “Like” this post for fear of being judged by “Liking” you.
    But I do like you…
    Is that weird?
    And what’s that rustling in the bushes?

    Like

    • Karen says:

      Ignore the rustling in the bushes!

      Oh, man, stop being funnier than me. You know, I saw that commenter yesterday, who replied to *your* comment and said you were hysterical, and I was thinking, hey, what am I? Chopped liver?

      But yes, please continue being hysterical and I’ll continue stalking you . . .

      Like

  12. ClewisWrites says:

    I loved this because it is true. There are different “likes” and you covered all of them. Now I just pray I don’t fall into one of the bad categories! Ha!

    Like

  13. bumblepuppies says:

    I clicked “Like” because I appreciate the irony of liking this post And that other one you linked to.

    I have a post coming out tomorrow on a related issue. I recommend ***NOT*** reciprocating the like.

    Like

  14. oneawkwardyear says:

    Oh gosh, now I’m going to go through all my my “likers” (all like, four) and worry about who’s genuine! Ha. Great post. Looking forward to tomorrow’s insights.

    Like

    • Karen says:

      They all count, even the less than genuine ones! And does it really matter? If they’re lurking or stalking or only pretending, who cares? I plan to celebrate my Follower 1000 when I hit that milestone, even if it is just some dude who’s trying to sell me generic Viagra.

      I should probably stop writing posts about this topic because it always seems to make people suspicious of their Likers/Followers.

      Like

  15. Dagny says:

    If you had titled this post ”Generic Viagra’ your search engine ratings would have shot through the roof. There are enough references to the term in the post to add up nicely. There would have been 2000 (additional) followers/ likers overnight. #justsayin

    Like

  16. Madame Weebles says:

    I will sometimes just hit “Like” after I’ve read a post because I really can’t think of anything useful to say as a comment, but I want the blogger to know I was here and liked their post. But yeah, I’ve had my share of what are clearly “LIKE ME!” Likes.

    Like

    • Karen says:

      Right. I’ve had people tell me before they Like just so they blogger knows they stopped by.

      I very rarely Like a post. The blogger really has to blow me away in order for me to Like their post. I really need a Love button more than a Like button. Oh, wait, a Love button? That’s sounds really dirty. 😉

      Like

Comments are closed.