Would You Like Your Porn With Condoms, or Without?

One week ago here in the US, we held national elections, and somebody or other won, I think.  You probably can find the results somewhere else on the interwebs.  God help you if you come to this blog looking for insightful political commentary.

While everyone else was tallying blue states and red states, I was busy monitoring the outcome of California ballot initiative Measure B, also known by the sexier name, the Safer Sex in the Adult Film Industry Act.  Looks like it passed, with 55.9% of the vote.  From the LA Times article:

The new law requires porn actors to wear condoms and establishes a permitting system similar in some ways to how Los Angeles County inspects restaurants. Porn producers are required to purchase health permits from the county, which will do spot inspections on porn sets to make sure condoms are being used. The inspectors can close production if the filmmakers don’t comply with the rules.

The Mexican dishwashers pee in the soup.

This Ruby’s Classic Burger fell on the floor, but they served it to you anyway (and you should have ordered your drink with no ice!)

So that means they’ll have Porn Inspectors now, right?  Like Health Inspectors, only with porn?  I worked my way through college by waitressing in filthy restaurants (don’t ever eat at the Ruby Tuesday in the Springfield Mall) and all I remember about visits from the health inspector was that we could NOT keep the ice scoop in the ice while the inspector was there.  It had to be up and out of the ice, on a little ledge inside the bin. It was fine to keep the ice scoop down in the ice any other time, where our grubby hands could grab it and spread our grubbiness all through the ice, just it wasn’t ok to leave it down there during a health inspection.

I’m thinking the passage of the Safer Sex in the Adult Film Industry Act will work pretty much the

Sad Condon :(

The mascot for the Safer Sex in the Adult Film Industry Act.  Available as  a plush toy or a lapel pin.

same way health inspections work in restaurants:  The health porn inspector arrives unexpectedly, sending the waitstaff naked people into an absolute frenzy trying to covertly alert one another by hissing through their teeth, “The porn inspector is here!  The porn inspector is here!” or by making wild pantomime gestures that no one can quite understand.  Meanwhile, the restaurant manager porn director will act friendly and chatty with the porn inspector, trying to steer him away from the cream cheese being held at 50°F   bareback sex.  In the end, the porn inspector will note that this is the third time he’s given a warning about the ice scoop in the ice  lack of rubbers on set, and he’ll shut the whole thing down.

The adult film industry is threatening to challenge the new law, of course, because they believe porn consumers prefer their porn without condoms and safe sex will kill their profits.  If you’re interested, you can read about  the potential legal challenges over on Pornlaw.  Yes, there really is a blog for everything.

Ok, so my question for you, dear reader: do you like your porn with condoms, or without?

Royalty free stock photos including the images in this post can be found at Stock.XCHNG and freedigitalphotos.net.

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15 thoughts on “Would You Like Your Porn With Condoms, or Without?

  1. virtuous and beautiful says:

    I thought this was an interesting proposition, and was wondering what the real reason for it was. Like the human trafficking one, that if you are found with a person in your trunk, you are automatically a sex offender! Say what??? At least that is how I interpreted it.
    The porn one… I was wondering what was the real reason, because it really is an illusion of how sex is not really like even with condoms.

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    • Karen says:

      Finally a serious question from a commenter on my blog! Usually I only get requests for pictures of my boobs.

      The proponents of Measure B are looking to provide a workplace protection for the, um, actors who appear in adult films. That is, they hope through requiring condoms, the new law will prevent the spread of HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases.

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    • Karen says:

      That does sound like a sweet gig, doesn’t it? Sitting around all day, watching porn videos, looking for unwrapped willies. But the goal of the law is to prevent the spread of disease so sitting around until after the film has been made would be a little bit like waiting until an e coli outbreak before you go out and check to see if the local Jade Dragon is serving up domestic short hairs on the menu.

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  2. Ned's Blog says:

    My guess is that health inspector applications will see a marked increase of potentially 200 percent. That said, in our restaurant, we always treated the inspector to lunch, so ….?

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  3. sqeekchair says:

    If porn actors/actress’s do not want to wear condoms, get tested, or “practice safe sex,”- which is a total lie, then that is their problem. Oral sex is not safe. Why should we police porn? Why should we care? Seriously. They are all adults- it is their industry, they know they are having sex with strangers-therefore, it is their problem. Why not police um.. say.. child abusers? companies who discriminate against the unemployed? Porn actors- take a big dose of “who cares?”

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  4. sqeekchair says:

    Well, my boobs aren’t fake and they are a D-cup. As far as bodily fluids- get one of those water-proof mattress covers. I made that mistake in not getting one. I don’t like that mess on my bed, even after cleaning it, it bothers me.

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